From the other side

Ladies and gentlemen, as promised... the story from the other side.

You had caught side of this cute fella in the morning, he was entering the office after he swiped his badge and offering his opinion on the cricket match from a week before. "Men!", you mutter to yourself, and mentally roll eyes while you move along. But then in the afternoon, as you approached the cafeteria and walked along the glass of the corridor, you saw him again! "Oh my God he's cute", you tell yourself and smile to yourself. Hush, hush!! Can't let him know that you saw him... look away when you enter through the door!

As usual, you're stranded again in the cafeteria... waiting for your friend to come and join you for lunch. You hate this guy's sense of timing: can he never come on time? But well, you have stolen two glances at the cute guy by now, and it seems that his friends have noticed you as well. When will he see you, sighhhh... looks like they are discussing something funny. Why isn't he smiling? Oh... that cold stare literally froze the other guys and their words stopped! Gosh... you wonder how it would feel to experience that firsthand.

And then your eyes meet! God has a weird sense of humour, he did grant you that stare. Hmmf, all men are the same... this dude was ogling at you too! Well, maybe not: you think. After all, he might be looking around just like that. What was he looking at, anyway? You look around. Oh that girl from HR: she's here. Gawd she has no dress sense at all. What made her think that orange top will suit her ochre yellow sandals and heels? She's a real bitch, you're sure. And although you hate to admit it, you are a bit jealous because when she had visited your bay, you had found your team-mates looking at her. Hmm.. the slut!

Speaking of team-mates, ahh there he is! Your friend has arrived. He comes and sits down beside you. He reminds you of the funny email forward, quoting lines from it. You laugh up. Yeah you know, he's funny... but you never look at him 'that' way. He's a good friend, thats all. Anyway, looks like the cute guy isn't looking any more. :( :( "Don't flatter yourself...", you mutter to yourself: he probably has a girlfriend already! So now you start telling your friend about how you surprised your best friend the other day on her birthday. How you threw the surprise party, how the cute puppy white doll came out, how she was so happy.

Hmm, lunch is over. You hate to admit it, but you are still a little hungry. Doesn't matter: a little dieting is good every now and then. Your table has become silent now, your friend has also finished lunch. "Lets go", you say --- and the two of you move out. What happened to the hottie, you wonder... and sweep the room with your glance. Your eyes meet again, but now this dude seems to be looking at you constantly! Oh My God!! Sigh... sigh... this can't be true. Your heart has skipped a beat, but you must maintain the countenance. You walk outside, and then purposefully choose to walk away from the corridor leading to your bay. The silent beating heart, the glances stolen from the corner of your eye, and the little sigh from your lips: they all melt away as you walk on. You note the time: the man must take the hint and be here same time tomorrow.

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P.S. - Ladies, please tell me how accurate the above was. I can tell you that the last post from the guy's side does happen to me sometimes :)

The crush

I'll describe this from the point of view of a guy for now. The next post might be from the point of a girl, or as far as I understand their psyche. ;)

It all begins with a "wow"... a complete open-mouthed jaw dropping wow. You see a girl in the distance, maybe standing alone or eating her lunch at the office canteen. And something about her haunts you... those wonderful eyes, the innocent gaze, or maybe even the smooth glowing skin. She seems to be waiting for someone, a friend maybe? Does she need some help? Can you do something to help? You wonder.

Your friend notices and follows your gaze. Almost always asks for certain, "Dude, she looking good to you?". You blush a bit, ears going red that the friend had actually discovered the stare. You immediately take your eyes off, and stare back at your friend. Maybe if it is a good friend, you say "Yeah, she looks good" and the two of you go on; just guy talk, you know! The friend tries to bring up the topic as you settle down yourself, to tease you, but your cold stare or the fun you make of yourself on the topic stops the conversation.

In the meantime, you have been surreptitiously looking towards her, stealing glances, so to say. And once your eyes meet. Voila, the world has gone blank! You hastily withdraw the gaze: she's caught you! You suddenly become very interested in the discussion at the table you are seated at... be it a Rajinikanth movie or the Indian cricket team. But the crazy one in your heart wants you to steal a couple of more glances... anything for that beauty! Between munches of roti or asking the neighbour to pass the salt, you look up and sweep the room with your eyes, lingering just that extra second on the jewel.

By now, the friend of the girl has arrived --- lucky dawg, you mutter to yourself. Oh yes, she looks so good when she smiles. But you don't like the fact that the "friend" in question is sitting so close to the girl. Cracking jokes, eh? Damn!! You want to go up and wring the neck of that guy right then and there... you want to go up and tell him, RDB style, "Oye, bhabbi hei teri". But that is a distant dream. The guy has stopped talking now, and the girl is animatedly telling him something. Oh boy... you could have given anything to be in that guys shoes right now, listening to whatever she's saying; right from her nailpolish to how she found a bug in the code! But, unfortunately... you're stuck.

Hey, hey hey... hold on! The duo are moving out! Why does she have to leave? Oh, that smile!! She looks around the room once again, and your eyes meet. This time, you don't give up the gaze... you're staring. She immediately looks the other way and continues talking to her 'friend'. You follow them out of the door with your eyes, and then as they exit, you realize that you had been holding your breath for some time. A sigh escapes your lips... and it is then that you realize that the table where you're seated is really silent. Everyone is looking at you... like you're the smitten kitten! What the heck... you ignore the sly smiles of your friends, try to wriggle out of the mischievous questions asked in conspiratory tones, and eventually give in. Looking down and avoiding everyone else's gaze, you admit, "Okay okay.... so I had a crush on that girl who just left!!".

Yet another software guy

A common theme I see in many blog posts is that of some people getting married, or their friends getting married and such. Which is all very rosy, until the groom in question is a software professional. I've seen people posting things like 'monotony', 'boring', 'yet another software guy' and such things without the slightest hesitation on these topics... like such people are the scum of the earth. The pseudo-intellectuals go out to give advice, asking their friends to think twice before they marry that guy. Your life will be ruined... you will give up everything you could be and will be stuck, and so on and so forth comes the advice. And this sort of gets me mad.

Yes, a lot of software engineers do the same stuff all day: ponder over and write code, when they are not attending meetings. But who the hell are you to judge all such people under your enormous intellect? You don't even know what they think about, learn and work with --- but you are the first to come up with an opinion on ALL software professionals! Do you think that becoming an engineer is easy? All the toils of going to the tuition classes, surviving exams where each professor thinks theirs is the only subject the students have, living through hellish conditions in hostels and messes just to get that degree --- all that is a farce? People spent the prime time of their lives learning how the immense machinery works, how all of it fits together, and you come there and pass your sacred judgement: yeah they're all the same!

Who the fuck gave you an authority to judge everyone, eh? What the hell do you know or understand of software that you pass your smart-ass comments? How many times do you think and ponder a moment before you fish out your credit card? Do you ever wonder what helped the contractor decide which cement will support the building you're in right now? Does your fat ass ever wonder about how the car you rode to work today was designed, what softwares aided that? Do you even know that your life insurance premium and all the people who depend on that insurance are safe because some bloody software engineer wrote the code to track them?

Dear armchair visionary, please step down from your ivory tower and look at the human before you pronounce your judgement. All the time you hear women wanting someone who will love them for the person they are and not their breasts. Well, reciprocate that --- don't judge a guy just because he is a software engineer. Look at the person, and know him! There is enough life beyond the office that you'll find in the guy. Stop being foolish, and stop your juvenile antics decrying anyone because he is working in the software industry. He has earned every single penny that comes in his fat paycheck... he deserves it! You don't want to marry someone financially stable --- that is your lousy problem. Stop being a loser and calling the grapes sour --- you don't deserve them!

Find the FoBs

It is always easy to pick out the FoBs in any place --- be it an office, a college, or any place. Now, since you don't know what a FoB is, I shall save the full form till the last. The following will guide you in discovering them, especially in an office:

1. Always moves in a group, never alone. As though the others will try and eat them up as soon as they're available in a dark corner!
2. Stares about open-mouthedly at everything. Be it a tall building, a hot chick, or a fountain; so long as he's not seen too many of those before, he'll stare.
   
3. Always diligently appears on time at work. The concept of stretchable time takes a lot of time to settle in.
4. Wonders why he is not assigned work... actually goes around looking for some work if he can.
5. When you cut a joke, always wonders if you are taunting him or if it is just a joke.
6. Diligently takes care of all office stationary, including the little piece of post-it notes you gave to him to tell him the name of the nearest bus stop.
7. Is skeptical to approach the free coffee/tea machines --- as though he's stealing from them.
8. Thinks a thousand times before he decides to swap his cranky chair with one from the meeting room.
9. Believes that getting a laptop from the office is the greatest achievement.
   
10. Looks condescendingly at other (fresher) FoBs when the new guys come in.

FOB = Fresh Off the Boats! New hires or new recruits, basically! Yeah... I was one only about a year back! :D