If only you knew

You had a lot of potential. Even if the resume does not paint a complete picture and a book cannot be judged by its cover, your resume was very impressive indeed. In person, you were much more impressive. Actually, the fact that you got admitted into one of the best places for your degree was testimony enough that you had what it took to make a difference, to change the world. But you've sent it all down the drain. And every single day, you seek approval of your fellow beings that you're actually not such a loser --- that you're welcome whenever/wherever you go.

Lets start at the beginning. You thought, rebelling against it all was the way to go, to break your nerdy image. So you rebelled. Got a flunky hair colour, stopped attending classes, lived off fast food that took away whatever money you had faster, and then when you were almost broke, you found a job and went for it. Of course, since you're a single bachelor, the job paid the bills. It still allows you to indulge yourself once in a while --- you buy every item that catches your fancy. But that is what it is, in the end: your fancy. You have never had had determination enough to see something through to its end. Actually, you used to have it. Before you decided to rebel, you used to be a good student, a nice man with a lot of social skills. Along came the revolution, and it took down everything that you ever held mighty.

You talk gibberish and try to sound intellectual. There are sparks of brilliance, I know... but what I better know is that you doused the rest of the fire in you trying to prove a point to no-one. You cook up fancy arguments, and you like to believe that when you have those arguments you're actually winning them. As it turns out, if you close your head to the point of view of everyone else, you can never be defeated in an argument --- you will perceive your own triumph every single time. No matter what others try to tell you, you will always think you won the shouting match. But do we really care? Unfortunately, no.

Look around you --- you've bought everything that caught your current fancy. Guitars, electronic musical keyboards, multiple computers and laptops, wireless keyboards, video cams: you bought them all. When they were new, you spent a couple of days fiddling with them and professing that you are going to be an expert in that. But soon the euphoria passed; and now you rarely use them, actually. Once you're past their golden charm, they're just as useless as the pebbles on the roadside. I just don't think, I know that you will never ever use any of them for anything useful.

Yes you've got money. But what you don't know about yourself is that the money you get isn't worth yourself. You have a lot more potential, and you are capable of much bigger things. Don't sell yourself short --- wake up! That little job isn't worth your brain: you can do much better! The ones you call friends around you are just birds of the fair weather: they are here for a share of the extra money that you have. Right now you may think that you're their hero because they agree with whatever you say. But once you are broke they will not stand by you --- they'll be gone faster than you think. Listen to people who point out your follies, and realize that they are the true friends. Don't drive away the little well-wishers you have with your boasts of the money you have --- when the ego shatters, the glass pierces every step you take. Alas, if only you knew!